I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
Last time i carry you out of a forest
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
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