yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
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