I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
I showed him my bush... on skype.
Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
Randomize
