I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
I'm too high and old for this...
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
Randomize
