I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
Randomize