I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
