Midget sex pt 2 tonight
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
