dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
Randomize
