I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
Randomize
