I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
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