that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
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