well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
I didn't notice because vodka
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
