he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
Randomize
