I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
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