hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
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