Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
Randomize
