it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
Randomize
