so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
Life lesson: when driving and throwing up, choose a paper bag over plastic. Fuck my life.
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
There are so many birds around me. And squirrels. I feel like that chick from Enchanted...but like if she had a dick and made poor life decisions.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
Randomize
