oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
