You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
My ex-fiancee UPS-ed me a sixer of tall boys, and a fifth of bourbon for christmas, from halfway across the country. What does this mean?
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
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