Hey guys thanks for lettin me crash at your place for the weekend, I had a great time. PS I got three quarters of a hand job from an asian on the dance floor last night. True story.
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
Such a big mess for such a small penis
Randomize