I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
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