You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize
