butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
Just cropdusted the office
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
I was about to send you a concerned-for-your-safety text b/c it took you more than ten seconds to respond to a text that mentioned both the bar and lesbians
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
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