She went from zero to smokin in five shots
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
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