Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
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