didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
weddingsv make me drug and hornr
I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
Randomize