My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
My mom found a condom in my purse
Correction: my mom found a used condom in my purse.
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
