i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
I'm upset that MJ died and all but waking up to his face on my HDTV in the middle of the night while half-asleep is pretty much the scariest fucking thing ever.
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
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