i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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