I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
Randomize
