She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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