Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
