some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
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