Define "chronic" masturbator.
i may or may not be watching the land before time
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
Randomize
