he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
