Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
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