haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
I was just giving a mobile app demo to a client, on my iPhone, when a reminder alert appeared across the page blinking "12pm: go home and give John head". You're an asshole
Hahaha oops.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
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