How does everyone that never saw me naked know I'm built like a smurf?
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
