Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
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