i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
Randomize
