I puked while I was brushing my teeth this morning and had to get a new tbrush
Ew, did you brush them again?
Yeah but i puked on the new one and decided to give up...failure
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
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