theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
