I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
Randomize
