We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
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