Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
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