Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Sorry, Geoff can’t come to his phone right now. He’s outside trying to show his dick to a bachelorette party bus with “DTF” written on the windows
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