wanna go halves on a baby?
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Randomize
