This is not my ceiling
just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Randomize
