: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
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