love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
Just Everbombed a Guiness to make up for cutting out early last night. Also the Mars probe. Happy birthday motherfucker!
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
Randomize
